Journal | May 2017

Where to begin. Life is so full. I could say busy, crazy, overwhelming, <insert all the dramatic words here> but I like full. Bursting at the seams. Jack, age three, has just blossomed into this awe inspiring little human. I spend every day with him but often feel like I've missed some major transition between the leaps he makes, sometimes seemingly overnight. I often find myself saying, WHERE did he learn that?! He's amazing and sweet and just the coolest person I know, hands down. But let's be real for a second, he's 3 ... deep breaths ... and exhale ;) He reminds me every day that the hardest things we are faced with are often the most rewarding. He is most rewarding. At the end of the day no matter how hard it has been there's a sweet surrender in us all and we go to bed with lots of snuggles and promises of a new day and fresh start when we wake. Three years has gone by in a blink of an eye. I want time to slow down but at the same time love the growth and change I see in him and in our family as he gets older. It's such a mix of emotions this parenthood thing =) 

School marches on! I am moving along in the prerequisites I need to complete before applying to a MS dietetics program. It's gotten more challenging, partially because I've transitioned into taking classes completely online and partially because the classes are getting more difficult, but thankfully also more interesting! Learning sciences like organic chemistry without a lecture is a practice in resourcefulness and self-discipline. I think the hardest part it it is extremely more time consuming than a traditional in-person class, in my opinion.  I got into the college that offers the MS program I will apply to next fall. So that is one step in the right direction! The program I am applying to is a second admissions program, so after I take a handful of their specific prerequisites, I will be eligible to apply to their dietetics program. This winter semester was my first at EMU. I had a Nutrition class online at EMU and the organic chemistry class online was at a separate community college in another state. It's truly amazing how today's college experience can be. I feel so old when I talk about "when I was in college the first time..." haha... but literally things have changed so much as far as taking classes online and it being so common now that the hiccups that I experienced as a student 10 plus years ago have all been worked out, making online learning much easier now than it was back then. Not to mention the ease of textbook rentals and finding used ones for a fraction of the cost a lot of times! Also the access to infinite amounts of information online, from tutorials to full on lectures! Seriously so different from before. I also feel infinitely more dedicated this time around. Lots in my life has changed in the 10 years since I graduated with my BA. I feel like I have a lot more riding on school this time, I have a bigger purpose, a focus. I know what I want to do and I know why I want to do it. It's a pretty powerful feeling to have those two pieces in place. I don't think I had that sense in my early twenties. Now when I want to cry and just give up because I am not ashamed to say it's all so very overwhelming a lot of times, I have my little beacon that always pulls me back in and makes me put my big girl pants on and ramble on. 

This year I have a few goals I want to note to see how I fare a ways down the road. I'd like to find a better balance in my life. Marriage, kiddo, school, work, social life, me. All of those things do not currently have a fair share of time. And most of those get no time. I know it's a lot to ask for complete balance, but perhaps a shift in different directions here and there. That'd be nice. Another goal, blogging. I really want to find time to get on here more often. It gets pushed to the waaaaaay back. Like priority zero haha! But perhaps I can fit it in more often and make it related to something happening in my life right then, so it somehow fits in without too much effort. Extracurricular effort (aka time)  is always my challenge. And goals for Jack, potty training, big boy toddler bed (cuz yes he's still in his crib... he hasn't attempted to climb out and anyone I ask nearly screams NOOOOOO at me when I say I might just switch him haha... clearly they long for the crib days of old ;) ... but that will have to come eventually right? He can't be 16 and still in his crib hahaha!). We still struggle with his eating, so that's always and forever a goal. Daycare and preschool (hopefully combined) are in the works. And just more other kid time for him. Being an only child he needs to be around other kids as much as possible. So those are my goals for him this year! I know how time flies, so it will be interesting to look back on this in a while or a year and see how we've done. 

This journal is mostly to remind me of this moment in my life. If you're reading along, hello and thank you =) 

 

 

Journal | March 2016

 Pergamit Farm,&nbsp;November 2015

Pergamit Farm, November 2015

 Home, February 2016

Home, February 2016

  Home, February 2016

Home, February 2016

 Home, February 2016

Home, February 2016

  Home, February 2016

Home, February 2016

     Jack is almost 2. He is the light of my day, the bags under my eyes and all of my heart- save the spot Chris occupies. Our little guy never ceases to amaze me. After having him, my perspective on life changed. I mean that sounds like a big "duh" statement, but as my best friend likes to say 'you don't know, til ya know'. You hear about it, you read about it, your best friend tells you all the good, the bad and the ugly of it, but truly... 'you don't know, til you know'. Life upended for the time being, I was searching for something solid to grab hold of, to ground myself, then to shove off of as this evolved self I had become. This was something I could only find within, this was something no one else could provide. I have had an inkling of wanting to change my career for some time now, so six months after I had Jack I made the decision to leap in and change my career path. This meant going back to school online and at night, while continuing to edit photos for an amazing photographer, which I have been doing since 2012. It's a juggle, it's not easy, but so far so good! It's given me the sense of self I needed and with Jack as my beacon I have never driven rougher waters with such confidence and hope. I have gotten through my first few chemistry classes with a new found love of science. I had to start at the bottom, having never taken any chemistry. It sounds like a nightmare right? As crazy as it sounds even to me, I really like chemistry, it seems to agree with me. I have also completed other very interesting prerequisite courses like medical terminology, basic nutrition and psychology - which I have no idea how I got through my first degree without having to take basic psychology! But it's checked off the list, whew! I started an internship this month, online, under these fun and savvy dietitians - The Nutrition Twins. I am so excited to learn from them. My first task included recipe research and food photography, I mean... It really couldn't be more up my alley! 

     My close friends and family know I'm going back to school to become a registered dietitian. I bet some of them wonder how I made the leap from photographer to dietitian. At first it seemed like a random choice even to me. But the more I thought about what I am constantly drawn to, it actually made so much sense. In my photography, while doing wedding and portraits as a much loved business, I always had a personal passion for food photography. This lead me to embark on personal photographic projects such as my year with Erickson Ranch. It was not just seeing food as a beautiful photo -which I do love - but I strove to understand the story of where our food comes from; from the people who take on the huge task of growing and providing local food, to how we prepare our food and what it does for our bodies. The deeper I got the more I wanted to know. Being a dietitian will take me deeper. It has captured my interest like nothing else, well... I say nothing else, except photography. But that is what made me realize I had chosen the right path, if I was going to make such a change. Having pursued my passion for photography as a career for the last 10 years, I knew I needed to have that much passion in whatever I was going to dedicate my career to for the next twenty plus years. And I never thought I was giving up photography, I could never stop. As something I do just for my own personal interest I have found a slower pace with it, it's been such a nice change. But I do see it making an appearance in my future career. My immediate goal is to get through school and to get my license but there are always grand schemes waiting to be hatched. 

     I thought I'd start this little series called Journal. For myself, a reminder of these days.