Journal | May 2017

Where to begin. Life is so full. I could say busy, crazy, overwhelming, <insert all the dramatic words here> but I like full. Bursting at the seams. Jack, age three, has just blossomed into this awe inspiring little human. I spend every day with him but often feel like I've missed some major transition between the leaps he makes, sometimes seemingly overnight. I often find myself saying, WHERE did he learn that?! He's amazing and sweet and just the coolest person I know, hands down. But let's be real for a second, he's 3 ... deep breaths ... and exhale ;) He reminds me every day that the hardest things we are faced with are often the most rewarding. He is most rewarding. At the end of the day no matter how hard it has been there's a sweet surrender in us all and we go to bed with lots of snuggles and promises of a new day and fresh start when we wake. Three years has gone by in a blink of an eye. I want time to slow down but at the same time love the growth and change I see in him and in our family as he gets older. It's such a mix of emotions this parenthood thing =) 

School marches on! I am moving along in the prerequisites I need to complete before applying to a MS dietetics program. It's gotten more challenging, partially because I've transitioned into taking classes completely online and partially because the classes are getting more difficult, but thankfully also more interesting! Learning sciences like organic chemistry without a lecture is a practice in resourcefulness and self-discipline. I think the hardest part it it is extremely more time consuming than a traditional in-person class, in my opinion.  I got into the college that offers the MS program I will apply to next fall. So that is one step in the right direction! The program I am applying to is a second admissions program, so after I take a handful of their specific prerequisites, I will be eligible to apply to their dietetics program. This winter semester was my first at EMU. I had a Nutrition class online at EMU and the organic chemistry class online was at a separate community college in another state. It's truly amazing how today's college experience can be. I feel so old when I talk about "when I was in college the first time..." haha... but literally things have changed so much as far as taking classes online and it being so common now that the hiccups that I experienced as a student 10 plus years ago have all been worked out, making online learning much easier now than it was back then. Not to mention the ease of textbook rentals and finding used ones for a fraction of the cost a lot of times! Also the access to infinite amounts of information online, from tutorials to full on lectures! Seriously so different from before. I also feel infinitely more dedicated this time around. Lots in my life has changed in the 10 years since I graduated with my BA. I feel like I have a lot more riding on school this time, I have a bigger purpose, a focus. I know what I want to do and I know why I want to do it. It's a pretty powerful feeling to have those two pieces in place. I don't think I had that sense in my early twenties. Now when I want to cry and just give up because I am not ashamed to say it's all so very overwhelming a lot of times, I have my little beacon that always pulls me back in and makes me put my big girl pants on and ramble on. 

This year I have a few goals I want to note to see how I fare a ways down the road. I'd like to find a better balance in my life. Marriage, kiddo, school, work, social life, me. All of those things do not currently have a fair share of time. And most of those get no time. I know it's a lot to ask for complete balance, but perhaps a shift in different directions here and there. That'd be nice. Another goal, blogging. I really want to find time to get on here more often. It gets pushed to the waaaaaay back. Like priority zero haha! But perhaps I can fit it in more often and make it related to something happening in my life right then, so it somehow fits in without too much effort. Extracurricular effort (aka time)  is always my challenge. And goals for Jack, potty training, big boy toddler bed (cuz yes he's still in his crib... he hasn't attempted to climb out and anyone I ask nearly screams NOOOOOO at me when I say I might just switch him haha... clearly they long for the crib days of old ;) ... but that will have to come eventually right? He can't be 16 and still in his crib hahaha!). We still struggle with his eating, so that's always and forever a goal. Daycare and preschool (hopefully combined) are in the works. And just more other kid time for him. Being an only child he needs to be around other kids as much as possible. So those are my goals for him this year! I know how time flies, so it will be interesting to look back on this in a while or a year and see how we've done. 

This journal is mostly to remind me of this moment in my life. If you're reading along, hello and thank you =)